WARNING: In this entry, I will be referring to hypothetical authors of the show and some other people quite a lot. Do not take it on your account, dear reader.
Just watched a Ukrainian TV program about a 19-year-old trans girl. Goodness, I will never ever be so brave as to participate in that shit carnival. I'm just too closed as a person. It's worse than political shows on Russian TV. Having every bit of your private life discussed, with camera every now and then flipping to "shocked" and "concerned" audience, questions like "do you have sexual life?" and overall tone of the discussion being "whose fault her gender identity is". (I translated that phrase from transphobic language) Do you know why people are trans, according to their psychologist? Because they don't get fairy tales told to them in childhood. They give such simple answers to a topic still subject to research! Even more so, they suggest it like, "What can you do to avoid that?" Their advice was terrible. If I was "taught to behave like a boy"... wait, you thought I wasn't? Even not-so-violent methods my father used to insert me into the world of guys all failed! He signed me up for martial arts - once I tried hitting my nose so it would bleed and I wouldn't have to go there. But then my crossdressing sessions were never ever noticed until I told my mom this year - and she thought I'd made that up. I've made friends with some guys, they share some of my interests, but I'm not sure if they'll even accept me for who I am. The majority of my classmates I still can't sincerely get along with.
I hated just watching that. Was I there in the studio, I would've torn half of them apart. I hope they pre-recorded the audience, because some people grinned, some were obviously disgusted... Then only one person, the video editor, is to blame. Her grandma (who brought her up) just refused to accept her in the beginning! I could stop watching at that point. I don't need your approval! If you don't like me, I won't bother you with that again, just leave me alone! The last thing I want is anyone's judgment!
Shame on me for that, actually. I'm not too confident about myself, and that makes me think I'm not transsexual at all. Am I? Then who am I? Thought the question was answered a while ago. Thus another cycle of doubt begins.